A Day to Remember Forever - Thea's Home for Two Years

The day was long and this entry will be too! You might want to just skip to the photos this time! I never want to forget what we saw and heard today and I want Thea to be able to read it when she is older.

We left the hotel at 9am and didn’t return until almost 8pm. Eight of us, plus David, loaded up in a van. It was Mark and I, Kam, Thea, Nora, along with Steve, Beth and their sweet baby, Katie.

At the beginning of the week, Mark and I didn’t know which one of us was going to go to the orphanage. We were just going to see which person Thea took to and decide from there. She was doing so well, we had David tell her what we were going to do. She told him “okay”, with a smile. We drove three hours through the countryside, to visit Thea, Katie and Sophia’s orphanage – BeiLiu City Social Welfare Institute.

The driver and our guide didn’t use Mapquest (they ask for directions in China, imagine that!). Actually, it is kind of funny. They start out in the direction they want to go in, then just find their way through talking with local people. About 10 minutes from the orphanage, Thea told David that we made a wrong turn. She told them each street to turn on and sure enough, we ended up at the orphanage gates!! It was perfect timing because all of the children from the local school were headed home for lunch break.

Her orphanage was in a nice city area, with many local shops. Beyond the gates, there was a retirement home on the left and the actual orphanage building on the right. I was told that the babies lived on the second floor of the orphanage and the older children lived on the third floor.

In my previous entry, I mentioned that Thea was in the same classroom as the other children in the orphanage. She was not – translation mix-up :) All the school-aged children at the orphanage walk to the local elementary school a few blocks away. She went to the same school as the children, not the same classroom.

At the gates, there were several people who greeted us – Two nannies, four small children, a few senior citizens from the retirement home and two guards. They welcomed us with big smiles and lots of curiosity. David called the director to tell him that we had arrived. Before long, the director came out to see us, along with a couple more nannies and curious locals. The director and David had a very long conversation, while we took photos and looked around a bit. We didn’t actually go all the way into the orphanage grounds, but we were able to take as much video and pictures as we wanted from the gate area.

At one point in David’s conversation, he asked me to walk over to him, so that Thea could not hear. The director had tears in his eyes and waited for David to translate to me what he had just said. David said – “Kari, the director would like to say thank you very much to you and your husband for adopting this child. He is very happy for her and loves her very much”. The conversation (in Cantonese) continued and then David told me this – “Kari, the director told me that recently Thea has talked more with her nanny about being abandoned. They do not know if it is a made-up story or the truth. She told her nanny that she had parents and an older sister. She said that her parents passed out and her sister had to take care of her. When her sister got married, she had to leave her. Her sister was the one who left her at the local police station.” Quite honestly, at that point, I had to keep myself from crying. I don’t know what “passed out” means, but I can only imagine. And my daughter has an older sister! This is strange for me to know, since I have no idea if Ben or Eva have biological siblings.

After talking with me, David talked a little with Beth and Steve about Katie. Katie was left right in front of the retirement home, wrapped in a towel and inside an open cardboard box. The staff had the towel that she was wrapped in and asked if Beth and Steve would like it. Of course, they said yes. The handsome man in the photos, with the red shirt was the man who found Katie. He is a guard and he has found many babies left near the gates and the retirement home.

You are probably wondering what Thea was doing during this whole time, huh? Well, basically, she was quiet, happy, confident and proud. She said hello to each person that talked to her, but she held either Mark or my hand the entire time and sometimes stood behind us. She kind of showed us off :) The only time she got upset was when a little old lady said something to her over and over. I have no idea what it was, but Thea didn’t like it one bit. She made a face and avoided the woman as much as possible.

When our time was over at the orphanage, we drove to Sophia’s finding spot to take photos for Chuck and Lisa. It was a short distance, but the director actually drove ahead of us so that we wouldn’t lose our way.

Our next stop was lunch at an authentic Chinese restaurant. Once again, Thea showed us where to go. The restaurant is in a shopping district, very close to her school. I think we’ve figured out what to order and the food was awesome – fried rice, broccoli, corn (they put pine nuts and small carrots in the corn) and beef fried noodle – Yummy!! Thea eats way more than she should and I have to tell her when to stop.

The elementary school was right around the corner from the restaurant, so we stopped there to take photos as well. The school is huge and very nice.

Next, David asked if we were all up to the drive out to Thea’s finding spot. The area where she was left is extreme poverty, about an hour away from the orphanage, on the outskirts of BeiLiu City. Even though I had had enough of the van and squatty potties (seriously, I just cannot get used to those!), I was so thankful that everyone in the van said we should go.

BeiLiu city has many factories and is known for making porcelain. We were able to stop at the beautiful porcelain shop, right across the street from the factory on our way to Thea’s finding spot. I bought a gorgeous vase for our mantel and Chinese bowls with porcelain spoons so that our family can eat fried rice the correct way!

Our drive was interesting, frightening and sad. I should have Mark describe it because he had a look of horror and concern on his face the entire time. He asked several times “are you sure we should be doing this?” Some of the roads were awful with potholes the size of a small car and one lane traffic, basically playing “chicken” with vehicles made from what seemed like straws, tarps, popsicle sticks and an engine!

As we got closer to the site, it was obvious that Thea found things familiar. She stared intently when we passed the small market and old, crumbling buildings. After an hour, we finally arrived at the exact area where Thea was left. I did not think she would want to get out and I didn’t ask her. David had prepared her earlier that we were stopping at the place where she was abandoned and she said “okay”. Mark and I both got out to take pictures and video. Pretty soon, she jumped out of the van and grabbed our hands. I like to think that this is a good sign and that she is really ready to be adopted.

During our long, long, long day, there were several things Thea said or did that I wanted to mention. I have a lot of her conversations with David on video:
. She asked David to tell us that she speaks two languages - Cantonese and Mandarin.
. She wanted David to let us know that her teachers say that she is a very good girl in school.
. When Kam was tired on the way home, she gave him one of the small pillows we brought, covered him with his blanket and kissed his forehead really quick.
. She asked David how many grandmas she has at home waiting for her. Then she asked how many grandpas.

Our adventure finally ended at 8p, as we arrived back to the hotel. I cannot begin to tell you how happy I was to get out of that van! I praised the kids endlessly for sitting in a van for 11 hours without one single complaint!

I feel SO fortunate for such an AMAZING day :)

When it was time to go to bed, Thea took her shower, put on her pj’s, and let me brush her teeth really well. She left the bathroom to find her Barbie doll and then came back to take the Barbie’s clothes off. She washed the doll in the sink, washed her hair, washed the three outfits the doll came with and then braided the doll’s hair. This is the 2nd night that she has done this. She loves to show me how clean the Barbie is and what she has done with her hair. When the Barbie is naked, Mark is not allowed in the bathroom either!

Funny thing that happened this morning – Thea spit on the floor after using the mouthwash (okay, maybe not “funny”, but Mark couldn’t help but laugh). In China, from what I’ve witnessed, spitting is common and not necessary rude. Mark told her no, then she finished spitting into the sink. She’ll love me for telling you all that when she is 18, no doubt!

Wow, are you all awake right now? I certainly broke my promise of not typing long entries!! Enjoy the photos.

Tomorrow we are flying to Guangzhou for the last leg of the trip! Only 6 more days and we’re HOME!!!!!!!

Kam wants me to give a message to his hockey team – Ryan - I’m glad you are back to play goalie, Joel - I’m glad you don’t have to play goalie again and you get to score, Alex, Cole, Nick and Brent – score a lot of goals for me!

Good night from Nanning, China
Kari